Date: April 17, 2000 08:59 PM
Author: Don Operatico (email@example.com)
You'll only get this if you're familiar with Schubert's song cycle,
Winterreise. If not, you'll just have to get a recording and become
familiar with it. What a drag.
1.Gute Nacht: Having finished doing Monica Lewinsky, the Wanderer
bids her good night. Most applicable quotation: "Meine Hand liebt
das Wandern" ("my hand likes to wander").
2.Whitewetterfahne: Gazing at a weathervane on Monica's roof, the
Wanderer reflects on her infidelity ("She said she wouldn't tell
anyone about it!)"
3.Gefrorne Burgers: The Wanderer fortifies himself with big Macs,
that he might endure his suffering.
4.Kennethstarrung: While Kenneth Starr seeks out clues to
presidential misbehavior in the wintry landscape, the Wanderer
5.Linda-bomb: In one of the most beautiful songs of the cycle, the
Wanderer makes love to Linda Tripp and bombs a few countries to
distract the public.
6.Whitewasserflut: This one's mostly about leaks.
7.Am Flusse: Ditto.
8.Rückblick: The Wanderer remembers his night of passion with
9.Irrlicht: Stoned, the Wanderer beholds an image of Monica
10.Rast: Gives a new meaning to "Fühlst in der Still erst deinen
Wurm mit heissen Stich sich regen" ("You feel first in the silence
your worm which moves with a hot sting", or something to that
11.Frühlingstraum: The Wanderer has a wet dream.
12.Einsamkeit: But now, the Wanderer has to face the music alone.
13.Read all the seamy details in "Die New York Post."
14.Der greasy Kopf: The Wanderer's head is greasy from all the Big
Macs he has eaten to ease his torment.
15.Die Krähe ("The Crow"): The Wanderer suffers from the shrieking
of Monica to the media, but even more from the shrieking of the
Republicans who seek to make political capital out of his
misadventures, and from the media crows that batten upon scandal.
16.Letzte Hoffnung ("Last Hope"): Perhaps if he offers Monica a
cabinet position she'll call the whole thing off? Alas, it is not to
be. The Wanderer falls in a drug-induced stupor.
17.Mit dem Dorke: To make matters worse, she prefers Al Gore.
18.Der stürmische Morgen: Cannot the Reporters at least put off
afflicting the Wanderer till after noon?
19.Täuschung ("Deception"): Unfortunately difficult to pull off now
that meine Liebste has spilt the beans.
20.Der Wegweiser: The Signpost is the Poll which shows that 57% of
Americans would rather do it with Sieben-von-Neun.
21.Wirthaus: The Wanderer forgets his sorrows at a "hotel".
22.The Wanderer's name is "Mud".
23.Die Nebensohnen ("The mock sons"): The Wanderer, O woe! must pay
child support for Monica and Paula's children.
24.Der Liar-man: That about sums it up.
Date: April 29, 2000 04:19 PM
Author: Joan Abel
Subject: Hillary di Washington précis?
Masterful, Don! Now what can you do with "Die schöne Mullerin?"
...or what can the Wanderer do with her?
Es wird nicht lang vor Bills Schwanengesang... Es steht sich vor,
Unser Al Gore! Gute Nacht!